I am a product of the classic Yeshivah system. I was not given the option to sit on my butt and mooch off the system until I am 40 years old. I am therefore left with no option but to earn my keep by working. My question is: Why does the yeshivah system that I spent 16 years of my life in make me feel like I am a second class citizen for doing the right thing?!
That brings me to learning daf yomi. In the Yeshivah system, they look down at "balabatim who learn the daf with artscroll." My question is, where do they get the right to look down at us. As I stated in my first post, I firmly believe that a baal habos who learns the daf every day after meeting all his other responsiblities is alot better off SPIRITUALLY than many if not most of his yeshivah friends. And if he is learning late at night and needs some help from artscroll, so what? Why is all this looked down upon?
The following story is true, I promise. My wife was speaking to a friend of hers about house prices. The conversation was about how hard it is to afford a house in Flathbush and how many people are buying in lakewood because you get more for less. My wife said that she cant imagine living in a place where she will be looked down at because her husband works. Her friend, a lakewood chick at heart, said that it is not like that at all. She said, "my brother in law lives in lakewood and works and nobody knows." So my wife asked, "is it a secret?" So she said, "no but they just dont talk about it." As if it was a sickness in the family if the husband works!!! This is the same coversation other people have when speaking about cancer in the family. I was flabbergasted!! Moreover, if he is working and everyone thinks he is learning, why dont they realize that he is not in yeshivah?! There really is no accountability!!!
Please post your thoughts.
3 comments:
"I challenge you, to walk into Rabbi Solomon and ask him if your a second class citizen. I bet you that he won't answer yes."
but will he agree that earning your keep is the right thing??
probably not.
why???
In lakewood, the only reason one might feel like they are looked down on (nebbech) if they are not learning is because they themselves look up at the 'learners'.
I have lots of friends in Lakewood who work and don't think twice about what 'others', particularly the kollel people think of them.
This idea that working people need affirmation about their personal life choices from others not like them, is the problem.
Do what YOU feel is right and forget about anyone else!
great blog BTW, good shabbos
yeah. do what you think is right. my husband learns and my parents support me. (until my salary will pay forb e/t) i think thats right. my sister's husband, however, will not take money from my parents--he works a full time job. he thinks he's right. we're all very happy doing what we think is right. i'm sure my hardworking brother in law is not jealous of my full support in the least bit. because he knows that i am upkeeping torah.
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